Came up with something fairly clever to deal with the Internet access problem. Basically, I took a Windows laptop, configured it with Speakeasy's dial-up networking info, set up Internet Connection Sharing, poked a hole in its firewall for Port 25, plugged it into the WAN port on the router, and adjusted architechies.com's A record to point to the laptop's dynamic IP. The result is very slow, but Navi (who is in her new home in my closet) can exchange e-mail with the rest of the Internet and we can browse at dial-up speeds. (I'm not turning on HTTP because I can't imagine how bad Filespace would be with the server on a 56k modem.) Fortunately, the solstice gives us a nice long night to receive mail before morning.
(I still haven't heard from Riptide; Dad thinks they're probably closed for Christmas. Hopefully they'll be open next week...)
Except for my sister's computer, all the desktops are at the new house now, as is the AP. So are the two gigantic printers (a monster HP LaserJet 4 and an all-in-one OfficeJet 7400), to my back's dismay. Not everything is plugged in yet, though.
Tomorrow the movers are coming to pack everything else up; the day after they move it into the new house. We're getting close...